Finally Inspired.....

It took long enough, but I'm happy to report that I've been inspired.
I wrote a Facebook Status today that spoke to me. I'm not being vain....maybe I should have said "God spoke to me through it" because He did. My status was "I have decided to accept the fact that I will never understand some people." I have to say that I include myself in that status. I don't fully grasp or understand who I am either, but I don't think I'm supposed to.

I LOVE art. I collect art books and I have always loved Renoir, Mary Cassat, Monet, Degas, Van Gogh and then even Norman Rockwell. He wasn't an Impressionist, but his paintings are so incredibly lifelike and I love them. I have such an appreciation for both types of work! Then there are other types of art out there that I don't love....never loved Andy Warhol and his soup cans, or Picasso and the nude women who had their parts painted in the wrong places. I have an appreciation because they were someone's artwork, but I don't understand them. I also wouldn't take my eraser to the Lourve and try to change someone else's work.

So, when I wrote that status this morning it all totally made sense to me when I said I don't understand some people....I don't understand because I'm not the creator. The only one who truly understands a piece of art is the creator. When my children draw a picture and show it to me, sometimes I'm confused as to what it is, but they explain it to me. The drawing doesn't come to life and explain why it was drawn. Spectators (siblings) in the room may have their theories, but the only one who knows the art is the child who drew it.

God is our Creator. Some deny Him and try to theorize their life and purpose, but the truth is only God knows our life and purpose. We are His art. His craftsmanship. Just like I wouldn't dream of taking an eraser to someone else's artwork to change it (no matter how tempting), I can't change people either. It's not my job or my right because I'm not their Creator. I birthed my 3 lovely kids, but God still created them. Can't change them either.

So, all in all, it's a relief. I don't have to understand myself or other people. I'll leave that to the Creator. Loving them is hard enough, but I will always have an appreciation for art...especially an art that only God can create.

Thatcher is as unique as his name. He is his own little person. He tells it like it is....
Sunday after church he was explaining an event that took place in his class that morning. He told us the teacher poured water in a glass, filled it with kitty litter, then stirred it with a pen. I asked him what the teacher was talking about and he said "DEATH!" Then I asked what the kitty litter had to do with death and he quickly replied "I don't know I wasn't listening."

He had a field trip Monday with his Kindergarten class. His best friend up until Monday has been Peter. Two peas in a pod! Monday I picked him up from school and was asking him about the trip. He told me a little about it and then said that Bradley was his new best friend. He said they had fun on the field trip and were together the whole time. I said "What happened to Peter." He said "He wasn't talking to me or being with me very much." I said "What was he doing?" He said "Well, he was listening." I said "So....you WEREN'T listening?" He simply replied "I was listening, but I was also talking very quietly the whole time."

One of the many things I'm learning about being a mom is MY need for my children. Why did God give me these particular children? There are aspects and qualities in each of them that cause me to want to be a better person and a better mom. Thatcher keeps me laughing and I know I need him so I won't take life so seriously. I've never been a totally serious person anyway, but sometimes it gets harder finding the humor in the tiring responsibilites of life. I need my kids as much as they need me, and I like that.

Like Sands Through The Hour Glass.......

so are the Days of Our Lives. Yes, I admit I was once a fan of that show and watched it faithfully. I was always amazed at how fast the children on that show grew up. They were born in the winter and by fall they were running off with someone else's boyfriend. Even though the show was a little outlandish at times, one theme remained true throughout each season and that is.....time flies!

I'm still in my reflective state these days. I was looking through some old photos the other day of me in high school down to when I was a baby. Then I found pictures from the kids that I taught in my teaching days. I was flooded with memories. Not just memories of what was happening in the photos, but of my state of mind at the time. I can remember how my mind was geared and I remember for so long being in the "if only" shift. "If only" I was older, out of school, married, had kids, had more money, skinny, blah, blah, blah....how many years were wasted in that state??

I can honestly say that at this present time in my life I am yearning for nothing. I am truly content. I don't wish for anything more because what I have at this moment is everything. I also know that nothing ever stays the same, there are more roads to be travelled, and more lessons to be learned. So, I cherish what I have right now!

I was sad looking back thinking about how dumb I was. Truly selfish. Even looking at photos of our wedding. I had NO CLUE what I was doing. No Clue what to expect of my husband or myself. I thought "happily ever afters" were reality and I constantly failed trying to live up to that, and so did everyone around me.

I was also thankful that I'm NOT where I was. It's so nice to be on the other side. I still have so far to go, but I've come a long way. I will say it again....HOW in the world do people function without the Lord?? I would not be where I am without Him. I owe EVERYTHING to God. I couldn't be content without HIm. I may not always be happy, but I have an inner peace and joy that ONLY comes from Jesus! TImes change, life changes, people change, but THANKFULLY JESUS NEVER CHANGES! He is the SAME yesterday, today, and tomorrow. It makes me giddy just typing that.

I don't care to know exactly how much sand is left in my hourglass....or apple shaped container. I just want to be the woman, wife, mom, daughter, sister, and friend that God intended for me to be right now.