A House Vs A Home

Yesterday, we officially sold and closed on our house in Michigan. Bittersweet. I begged not to attend the closing. For one, it's boring. And two, I don't like to meet the people who are moving into our house of seven years.  To me, it's the equivalent of meeting your exhusband's new wife. I don't have an ex husband and my ex is not married, but this analogy works for me. 

 A house is not just a house. It is a home. It is so much more than wood and beams. Houses are those structures you pass by on a walk and wonder who lives there. A home is where you pull into the driveway and can't wait to put on your pjs and flop on the couch.  We have memories in every square inch of this home. 

This is yet another home where we introduced another child into this family. Our third and last was brought home from the hospital here. Back up to the pregnancy test on our bathroom counter and the joy and excitement we felt. Back up more than that to the wall in our master bedroom. We tore it down between our room and the other bedroom to make a glamorous master retreat with a big bathroom. As we were taking a sledge hammer to the wall, my great husband chuckles "you'll end up pregnant and we'll have to rebuild this wall!"  Well, I was and didn't know it! Joke was on him!

When we first moved here our boys were five and three and now they will be a month shy of 11 and 13 when we leave.  We had many boy birthday parties on the deck from cowboy and Lego themed to Star Wars and water guns. What about them sledding down the stairs on box tops or having light saber fights and sleepovers in the basement. What about the first night we spent in this house before our goods made it. The four of us slept in sleeping bags on the floor in the den. 

Then our little girl entered the mix and pink became our favorite color whether we liked it or not! We went from stepping on Lego bricks to Barbie shoes and tiaras. The heaps of stuffed animals and pink blankets on the couch. The fairy birthday party with glitter that we still find in the carpet.

I fell in love with trash up here. Sure, I had found a few pieces before moving up here, but it exploded in Michigan. I furnished our home with curbside and Craigslist finds that I sweat over in the garage. I threw kids in the car with their pop tarts and pjs and went on trash hunts during the summer. The oldest boy would jump out in his bare feet and help me load it into the van with a sleepy smile! The garage floor has paint remnants in every color of the rainbow from when I just couldn't wait and decided to forgo a drop cloth. On most occasions really....

Oh the memories. I hate saying goodbye. This went from being the hardest move of my life to the best move of my life. We all grew up here. All five of us. We met awesome people, selfless people, loving people, difficult people, rude people- but they all left a mark that changed and shaped us into who we are. No regrets.

I went to the closing. I met the people and mustered a smile. I softened a bit and even cracked a joke or two. We had a slight hold up with our house in Florida that came out in the closing.  The buyers were asking us what happened. We explained. After our long explanation, the buyer husband wanted to know how we were so relaxed and happy even with things not going as planned. We were both taken aback by the comment. It never occurred to us. Then I felt bad that I hadn't softened sooner though they didn't seem to notice. 

All of this. This that I mentioned. All of the memories. The moving up here. The moving into this particular house. The schools we went to. The church we belonged to. The neighbors. The buyers. The doing. Our reactions. It is all for The Lord. Every little thing. Every square inch of our lives belong to The Lord. We are more than just people to him. He doesn't look at us and see what we see. He sees everything. He sees the beginning, middle, and the end. He sees beyond our abilities. And oh how much He loves us.  All of us. We get frustrated. We get teary. We get scared. Emotional....God has a plan for every little detail. Every little thing is because of Him and is used by Him.  I long to remember that first before I get caught up in the moment.  

I have seen this quote many, many times, but it is so perfect for the time we are in right now. I want to remember this in all things. Especially knowing who's hand is in it and who's hand never leaves even when He asks us to pack up and move...across country. I look at this house and the memories and I think "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."-Dr. Seuss

Snow's Got Me Thinkin.....

I've taken a few months, years off blogging mainly because I lacked the time, energy, or frankly motivation...but here I am! It's January 2014 and we are facing record breaking wind chills and almost three feet of snow. Today, I noticed a friend posting the temp in Anchorage, Alaska saying it was 30 degrees there and colder in Michigan! I smiled and it got me thinkin'.

We spent the bulk of last year facing a huge possibility that we would be packing up, moving across the U.S. and vastly north to Anchorage, Alaska for the next four years. Chris moved up there last January and worked a detail leadership position until the end of May. He came home every four weeks for just the weekend, then returned back up to work. It was hard, but we did it. We weren't sure of the timeline and we were constantly halting decisions from extracurricular activities for the kids, to vacations because we were so uncertain of the details of if and when we were gonna move. This uncertain way of life lasted until the end of September and it was stressful.

It wasn't a forced job change, it was an opportunity and an open door, so we went with it. We had a few naysayers along the way who said we were crazy for even entertaining the idea of such a move, that we had no business moving there, that it would be a bad move for us and we couldn't handle it, the darkness, the extreme cold, or the distance.  While we didn't welcome or even appreciate the negative comments, we just simply took them straight to God. We desperately wanted to do the right thing and we didn't want to tell God "no"!  We had already learned by this huge move to Michigan from Louisiana, now almost 7 years ago, that God's ways are not our ways, He's in control, and He totally blesses obedience!

So, we pressed on and prayed...a lot.  I went back and forth in my prayers from clinging to my wants to surrendering to His will.  When the job was finally posted, Chris applied. We just knew the job was his and we prepared ourselves. It was not ideal. We knew with the timing we would be moving in December to relocate before Christmas.  The kids would be in new schools and I was not excited about pulling out my kindergartner and sixth grader in their transitional years. One thing we did do, was involve the kids. We wanted them to know. We wanted them to pray. We wanted them to learn how to do life by following where God leads even when you are unsure.  So, when Chris applied, we all...all five of us had a peace about it. 

The fact that Chris did NOT get the job was so totally God. A person out of the blue, who couldn't NOT get the job, applied.  In the end, she was our sacrificial lamb. We took a step of faith, up the mountain, with our poles and snow shoes ready for this new venture, and God sent this person bleating in the bushes in our place!! It was a fabulous God display! In the end, we knew it was not about the job at all. It was a lesson about faith and I am so glad our kids got to experience it with us! Yes, Chris was disappointed and the kids were disappointed for him, but we also knew as we had said all along, that if God had really wanted our family in Anchorage, we would be there. It would be an adjustment as it was here, but all things work for good and we believe that!  

It amazes me how people whom I look to as so "spiritual" can be such negative and unencouraging voices! All they saw were the bad things about the situation and they didn't hesitate to let us know about them!  What's even crazier, is the same negative people had never even been to Alaska, but they sure KNEW we couldn't handle it! (Frankly, it was insulting). Then, thankfully, there were MANY others who prayed with us, encouraged us, sent us encouraging messages and texts, and prayed for God's will for us! There were hardships and blessings through out the entire process, but we learned so much!! We are thankful for all of it, and thankful that it's over!! :)

So, when I saw the temp for Anchorage, Alaska today and saw that it was colder here in Michigan, I had to smile. You never know what God has in store for you. We have absolutes and variables in our heads about the way our lives should go whether we admit it or not, but they can change in an instant and make us realize that there are no absolutes this side of heaven. We not only must be open and ready to God's command to step out of the boat, but also willing no matter the cost and no matter what our feelings are at the time!

So, today, I sit snuggled with a puppy on my blanketed lap and three kids sprawled out watching a movie preparing for another day off from school, in Michigan, where God has us at this present time.  Until He stands outside of our motor boat and asks us to get out and come with Him somewhere else....